My wife and I were blessed last year and able to go to England. We stayed in a hotel for a few nights and at friends for a few (Thank you Josh and Amy)! This was Kelly's dream vacation. She has always wanted to go to England and she got to do it! Well my dream vacation has always been Hawaii! Back in the day when I watched Magnum P.I. every chance I had, I have always wanted to go to the islands! Why you ask - not to surf (can't), not to get some sun (its 90 degrees here 8 months a year) I guess because of the beauty and history (pearl harbor). So now we have friends in Hawaii (Ben and Alyssa) so we are going to visit the islands! Problem number one - I cannot explain to all of you my fear of sharks and give that fear justice! People love the water, do they love the fact that they have arms and legs? Do they understand that big sharks are in the waters off these islands? Are they aware that these things are looking for food? Don't give me the "sharks won't attack a human on purpose" theory. Anything that is above 6 feet, can swim 60 miles an hour and not be seen until the point of impact I'm not giving the benefit of the doubt too. C'mon people wake up - don't give me the "shark attacks happen less than blah blah". I'm not playing the odds with my life or my left foot.
Kelly (talking to me) - "Well honey what are you going to do if your not getting in the water"
1. Live
2. retain limbs
3. get sun
4. Watch the water for possible fins to warn others
5. Look at girls - I mean watch for fins to warn others
7. check to make sure no two girls are wearing the same bikini - fashion mistake for them
6. Did I say "Live"
I will be very happy, tanned and still together by the end of the beach experience!
Don't ever get me started on snakes!
Later
Monday, January 24, 2005
Fears!
Posted by Jeff at 8:22 AM
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8 comments:
Jeff I am dumbfounded by your fear of sharks. I do not know why, but I just did not expect it. I have to say that you are going to miss out on so much by not going into the water. The snorkelling is absolutly amazing, the boogie bording is tons of fun, you do not know what you are missing. You do realise I am going to be nagging you to change your mind the entire time. Not that I ever nag but your are cousing me to take drastic measures. There is one beach the has man made laoggons in the ocean with a wall of rocks closing it in. So it is basically a pool in the ocean. Will you at least go in there?
Well Alyssa when you put it that way I'm ready right now to grab a boogy board and surf the waves - the waves of death! This will not get better tonight, Kel and I are going to watch "open water" - the scariest shark movie since Jaws - I've heard! I'm telling ya - Critique the bikini's I can do - hand to hand combat with Mr. Tiger shark- no way! Maybe the lagoon thing but I have to survey that situation!
Does that mean cliff diving is out of the question?
I mean you can only tour Pearl Harbor so many times. Here is an exciting bit of information for you. On base there is a building (now historical) that was attacked during Pearl Harbor and you can still see all the bullet holes. Pretty cool. Used to be a chow hall but is not offices. Open Waters was very low buget but pretty good, very short. My new goal for 2005 is to get you to swim in the ocean....and like it.....and go home with all limbs attached!
Honey I would still love you if you only had one foot! Especially after you scanned the whole beach for girls in twin bikinis. Right!
Jenn and I have also been thinking about going to Hawaii this year to visit the Turner's, so I have been thinking about the dangers of getting in the ocean, and I think I have to take Jeff's side on this one. I don't even get far enough to think about sharks, which are definitely out there, but what scares me more are jelly fish and Portugeuse man-of-war! You can go to any given beach probably any day and see those little guys, right? Alyssa's response is..."I just look in the water, and if I see them, we go to another beach." I'm sorry, but even if you don't see them, THEY ARE THERE!! I wouldn't even walk on the beach without constantly watching where I took a step. On another note...you mean there will be girls in bikinis on the beach? I never thought about that!
Sorry...I don't know why it defaulted to Anonymous, the above comment was me.
Thanks Kirk - you are not helping the situation at all here - give him something else to worry about! Maybe you guys can go when we do that way Jeff will have a non-swimming friend and Ben doesn't have to babysit Jeff all day "away from danger".
I'm glad I open up about the things that haunt me! The support is awesome! I have experienced the sting of the jellyfish not fun my little friends. I would not like the opportunity to see the death from the depths (made that up) its good though!
Word
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